Seven years ago, I was expecting my first child, at my second ultrasound I learned I was carrying a little girl. Her measurements always lined up perfectly, so I was only given two ultrasounds while carrying her. Both times I oohed and aahed as I watched her move inside of me, just like I did during my second pregnancy, when I carried her little brother.
Then came my third pregnancy, SURPRISE! You’re having TWINS! After a well deserved freak out moment, which included laughing, tears, and me blurting out, “I have two babies in my stomach!” to the doctor when he walked through the door, I was in a complete state of shock as I watched two babies up on the screen. It was amazing, surreal even, to watch one 9 week old baby wiggling as fast as it could, while the other remained extremely calm. I still remember the ultrasound tech making a joke saying, “At least you’ll have one calm one!” The hyperactive baby was quickly named ‘Baby A,’ while the mild little one became ‘Baby B.’
(9 week ultrasound)
A twin pregnancy is considered a high risk pregnancy, so I was given an ultrasound at least every four weeks, (sometimes more). Throughout my entire pregnancy, the more I watched those two little babies, the more I fell in love with them. At 16 weeks I learned I was carrying two boys. Each time those two little boys appeared on that small screen, the ultrasound tech and I would laugh as we watched their personalities match what we noticed at my first appointment. All ‘Baby B’ seemed to want to do was cuddle right in, while ‘Baby A’ seemed to be kicking away as he sought freedom. By the end of my pregnancy ‘Baby B’ seemed as content as could be because there was nowhere for his brother to escape to.
On a hot July day, I checked into the hospital already dilated to an eight, and vaginally gave birth to two small identical boys, just two minutes apart. They were immediately whisked away into the NICU, and I wasn’t able to see them until hours later. Throughout the next few weeks as I made daily visits to the hospital, one thing was obvious, ‘Baby B’ or Cruiz craved time with his brother Cannon. Cannon seemed to tolerate it, but after so long, he’d usually get a little restless and never seemed happier than while laying in his own bassinet. Now, two years later, I’ll catch Cruiz attempting to cuddle while watching a movie, and Cannon will push him away.
These memories have come to mind as I’ve watched the Planned Parenthood articles circulate on my newsfeed. I’ll admit in the past, I’ve turned my head to these articles, because I didn’t want to think about millions of babies being killed. But as I’ve thought back to my own experience and to what was so clearly present at just nine weeks in my two little boys’ lives, I feel like I need to take a stand for those babies who aren’t capable of doing so. Ask the ultrasound tech, my husband even, it was clear that my babies showed signs of their personalities at my first doctor’s appointment.
At nine weeks, abortion clinics don’t even bat an eye at performing an abortion. In fact abortions take place well into the second trimester, where babies are being torn apart, limb by limb, and having their tissues and organs sold. This has to stop. This year alone there has been 24,107,100, and the number increases every second. (Source:here) I realize there are times abortions are necessary for the mother’s life, or even in the case of rape, but from what I’ve read, and my own experience, I’m here to attest it was obvious my babies were very aware of each other during the second trimester. It teaches me babies can feel way before 20 weeks gestation. Don’t tell me that it isn’t painful for them to be ripped apart.
Though I often stray away from controversial issues, I hope maybe, if even one expecting mother reads this, and realizes the baby she is carrying is aware of so much more than she may realize, this might just help her consider an alternative. It’s time to start thinking of these babies as human beings.
And even as I type this, I see Cruiz (Baby B) sitting silently cuddled up next to his older brother, while Cannon (Baby A) runs around our house like a tornado. These babies are very much alive and aware of more than I think we understand at just nine weeks. I feel grateful my twin pregnancy taught me what it did.